Favorites 2K9

It's funny how a post morphs sometimes. I had originally planned for this post to be a "best of" collection of tracks featured in Sunday Night Selections, but as I dug through my blog archives, I came across a few other awesome things (or things that reminded me of awesome things) that I wanted to show some love to. So I ditched the all-music idea and replaced it with a list of personal favorites from the past year. Now this isn't some sort of all encompassing list or anything, just a list of a few things that rocked my world over the past year -- so don't read on if you're expecting me to talk about things like "Favorite Celebrity Scandal." That's not my bag.

Favorite Song: Bat for Lashes - "Daniel"
Despite heavy competition from Lady Gaga's "Bad Romance" and EAP Song of the Summer 2K9 winner "Help, I'm Alive" by Metric, Bat for Lashes' lead single from their album "Two Suns" managed to pull it out and snag this award. From the second you hear Natasha Khan's haunting vocals, you're immediately drawn in to the point where you stop what you're doing and aimlessly daydream about nothing. Pretty good for a one-off love song about Ralph Macchio's character from The Karate Kid.


Favorite Video Game: "World of Goo" by 2D Boy (PC / WiiWare)
It's been a long time since I have played a game as complete as World of Goo. The graphics were on par with anything else in its field, its score was top-notch, and the controls were super tight. Hell, even its story was pretty good (and not just "pretty good for a puzzler"). All amazing feats for a game created by two people. The only downside of World of Goo was its length. It's a fairly short game, taking maybe somewhere around the 10 hour mark to complete, but what a glorious 10 hours it is.


Favorite Wrestling Match: Shawn Michaels v. The Undertaker - WrestleMania XXV
Having been a long time wrestling fan, I've encountered more than my fair share of people who laugh and mock my hobby. I've heard the same lines for years - "this doesn't even look real," "why do you watch this, it's so uninteresting," etc., etc. And every time my response is the same, "Wait until you see the "right" match." There's wrestling matches you watch for fun, then there's wrestling matches that make you a believer. Matches that make you grimace with every slam. Matches that make you cheer with every near pinfall. Matches that get your heart racing with every slam. Shawn Michaels v. Bret Hart from WrestleMania X. The Rock vs. Stone Cold from WrestleMania XIX. Ric Flair vs. Ricky Steamboat from Chi-Town Rumble. These are the matches that are forever etched in your memory. Shawn Michaels vs. The Undertaker is one of those matches.


Favorite Internet Meme: Keyboard Cat
Thanks to a catchy jingle and a homemade video of a cat named Fatso, almost every web meme from the past was given a second chance to bask in spotlight. That was fine by me, because you know what, I don't think I laughed hard enough at the Grape Stomp Lady back in 2002...


Favorite TV Show That No One Else Watches: "Better Off Ted"
I'm not sure why no one watches this show. This weird combination of "The Office" and "Arrested Development" with some "Big Bang Theory" mixed in should appeal to everyone. Though looking at the ratings, that doesn't seem to be the case. With that said, here's to "Better Off Ted" obtaining cult-status and achieving strong DVD sales. Just do me a favor, when you're telling your friends about this great "new" show you found out about, remember where you heard about it first.


Favorite Social Network: tumblr
I've got over 600 friends on facebook, sent out over 10,000 tweets on Twitter, and watched countless videos on YouTube and I pick the social network I'm least involved with as my favorite. Surprised? You shouldn't be. The tumblr community is a very simple one. The people who participate there operate very much on the Beavis and Butt-head principle. Something is either cool or it sucks. Music, movies, games, books, pictures -- it's either liked or it's not. As a simple guy, I dig that. The tumblr kids also seem to be having the most fun. There's no "undersharing" in an effort to not be found out. The tumblr kids understand that social networking is all one big popularity contest and post content with that in mind. That openness, even if it leads to cases of super-narcissism, is awesome.

Favorite Story: "I Was Just Wondering Where The Geek Squad Boy Was" [link]
Working in Geek Squad was no where near as glamorous as it was made out to be like on "Chuck." He gets to be an international spy and romance a hot chick, while I got stuck helping dirty old men. Point, Chuck.

Ha. This was kinda fun. Maybe I'll make this an annual event...

Losing A Whole Year

As I sit here a couple days away from 2010, all I can do is sit back and reflect on 2009 and the year that it was. And in doing so, the only thought that repeatedly comes to mind is "Well that was a waste of a perfectly good year."

Now that's not to say that I didn't have a good time. Between eight months of unemployment and four months of football season, it would have been hard not to. I went to lots of fun places, had good times with friends old and new, and learned a few new things about myself. Hell, I even managed to pick up an absolutely fantastic girlfriend along the way. Socially, 2009 wasn't bad.

But on the professional side of things, I feel like I'm in the exact same position I was in at the end of 2008 - unemployed and loosely tied to a state with few career options. I don't even feel like I drew anything of lasting value from the job I did take on. I was overqualified and underutilized and as a result, didn't learn too many things I didn't know before. And while I'm not overly upset about either of those situations, it's hard to not be a little disappointed at ending the year and not having anything to show for it.

So what next? Honestly, I'm not sure, but I'll be damned if I'm going to be writing this same post come this time next year.

I'm gonna make 2010 "count."

Christmas: An Ebigness Production

One of my favorite things to do here is showcase Eric, one of my best friends and former roommate, doing ridiculous things. Over the past few years there's been quite a few Ebigness Classics. Like the time he attempted to steal 2nd base at a Clemson baseball game. Or how about the time he tried to jump over that ironing board. And let's not forget his infamous dance battle against [name redacted].

Good times are usually nearby when the camera's on Eric. But, as a Christmas present to you guys, I found a(nother) video where Eric's the one holding the camera. Talk about a rare find. So without further adieu...

Merry Christmas!

Cinco: Top 5 Gaming Experiences of the Decade

With the decade ending, it's been fashionable to make a "Top 10 of the Decade" list. Well, I'd love to join that party, but I don't have the time nor desire to make a top 10 list of anything. BUT, I do have time to break off a quick five-piece. And being who I am, I find it a fitting that my list runs down my favorite gaming experiences from the past 10 years. On to the countdown...

Honorable Mention: Portal (PC) - 2007
I'm not a PC gamer nor am I big on First-Person games. But Portal was so damn good, I'd be ashamed to not include it on this list. Banking more on puzzle solving and solid platforming design instead of armed combat, Portal was the thinking man's first person "shooter." Portal places you in the shoes of Chell, a girl the player knows nothing about, as he tries to escape the sterile environment of Aperture Laboratories. Armed with nothing more than a Portal Gun, Chell must navigate through an environment of lasers, tricky jumps, and changing environments in order to find her way to freedom. Along the way the player learns more about Chell, but also Aperture Labs, via the game's antagonist/narrator GLaDOS - an computer based lifeform that monitors Chell's journey. Portal's an odd bird at times, but easily deserving of a mention on this list.
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5) Marvel vs. Capcom 2 (Arcade, Dreamcast) - 2000
During a time when arcades were dying and the only draw left was the ultra flashy Dance Dance Revolution, leave it to Capcom to take everything we knew about 2D fighting games and turn it on its head. Grimy, urban environments? Gone. A small selection of cookie-cutter characters? Tossed out? Your standard early 90s rock? Dismissed. In its place, Capcom created the game that gave gamers and fighting fanatics everything they wanted and then that we didn't know we wanted. Colorful backgrounds set in places like an amusement park? Check. Random up-tempo jazz soundtrack? Why the hell not. And most importantly, a 56-character playable roster made up of favorites like Ryu, Chun Li, Spider-Man, and Wolverine? You. Damn. Right. Sure, the game was broken as 50+-hit combos were a common occurrence, but the game was so much fun no one bothered to care.
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4) Halo 2 (Xbox) - 2004
Take everything you ever loved about Halo, make it prettier, make it bigger, then take it online and you've got Halo 2. Halo 2 didn't break much ground over its predecessor, but its lag-free implementation of Xbox Live made it a much better experience. It's one thing to have a deathmatch with your friends around a TV, its a whole 'nother thing to have a deathmatch with your friends around a TV AND friends across across the country on another TV.
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3) World of Warcraft (PC) - 2004
Disclaimer: I've never played World of Warcraft. I have no desire to play World of Warcraft. Hell, the last Warcraft game I played was Warcraft II, which outside of setting has nothing to do with World of Warcraft. So why is it on *my* list? Because between almost universal acclaim and a userbase that's 10-million plus strong, I think it's safe to say that SOMEONE must think this game is pretty good. #GamerRespect
Watch A Video - LEEEEEEEEEEEEEROY JEEEENKINS!!!!








2) Wii Sports / Wii Sports Resort (Wii) - 2006 / 2009
I grouped both of these games together because let's be honest, everyone remembers the first time they played Wii Sports and the same can be said about Wii Sports Resort with the new Motion Plus add-on. Both Wii Sports games have become generation-defining experiences. Back in 2005, it was expected that the current generation of gaming would be ruled by Microsoft and Sony's impressive HD-capable consoles. "Graphics would be king!," was the proclamation uttered and everyone expected Nintendo's underpowered white console to be left in a cloud of dust behind its HD brethren. That wound up not being the case as people, not just gamers, flocked to the Wii, as they enjoyed being able to somewhat realistically simulate a trip to the bowling alley, a day on the links, or a round of fencing without ever leaving their homes. If that's not worthy of a spot on this list, then Wii Sports' ability to get (grand)parents and girlfriends playing definitely is.
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1) Rhythm-Based Gaming (Multiple Platforms) 2000-Present
If you walk into a household that has a gaming console created within the last 10 years, you're almost guaranteed to find one of the following: a plastic guitar; a plastic dance pad; a microphone; a clunky looking plastic drumset; a DJ turntable. Since the turn of the century, music-based games have dominated not only the sales charts, but living rooms across the country. And with good reason -- they're crazy fun. So in the issue of fairness, I couldn't grant the top spot to any particular franchise as all of them have played an important role over the past few years. Dance Dance Revolution started it all, Guitar Hero took it to the mainstream, and Rock Band made it a group event. On the periphery, Lips brought the karaoke bar home, Elite Beat Agents and Guitar Hero: On Tour took the show on the road, all while DJ Hero made anyone into a mixmaster. Over the past few years, the genre has slowed down due to over saturation (did anyone really ask for Guitar Hero: Van Halen or LEGO Rock Band?), but no bother, after ten years of rocking out with our cocks out, that may be a good thing. Here's to the next big thing in gaming!

Show & Tell: My Present To Myself

"If it comes with a steady paycheck, I'll believe anything you say."
"Your honor, I've seen shit that'll make your skin turn white!"
"Ray, if someone asks if you're a God, you say YES!"
"I LOVE THIS TOWN!!!"

Winston was never my favorite Ghostbuster, but he definitely was the one who provided the most memorable quotes. Amazing considering he doesn't show up until 2/3rds of the way through the first movie.

Two down. Two to go...

My Favorite Mistake

It took me eleven years to do so, but I finally did it.

I finally said "I'm sorry" to the one person on this planet who has a legitimate reason to hate me.

Like any other red-blooded 15 year old boy, I didn't think a lot before acting. If it felt good, I did it. And while most of the time, those impulses led only to actions that involved me suffering some sort of physical pain down the road, for a few months they involved a young lady who probably would have been better off [at the time] not knowing me.

Things started off innocently enough. Harmless flirting. Trips to the movies. Hours long phone and ICQ conversations about nothing. You know, the normal things lovesick teenagers do. Well, a (as in singular) lovesick teenager. Because for as much as this nice, sweet girl liked Terence, Terence didn't really feel the same way. She was nice and all, but I was only interested in one thing. Err, two things actually.

Hey, I was 15. Baby steps people.

Anyways, after a few weeks of being physically available but emotionally vacant, my conscience got the best of me and I decided to end things between us. Which, by itself, would have been fine, but someone had to go and make a big production out of it. It wasn't pretty, it wasn't classy, and it sure as hell wasn't one of my finer moments, but I did it. Pointless profanities and petty cheap shots included.

The jerk store called. They were all out of me.

Of course, after that we went our separate ways. Well, as best we could in a small high school. Once she graduated (I guess I did leave out the part about her being a year and a half older than me) we completely lost track of each other. But as time passed and that moment got farther and farther away from the present, I would occasionally want to reach out to her. Not because I wanted to continue to throw salt in a wound, or see if there was any chance in hell that we could hook up again, but because I had started to genuinely feel bad for how I treated her.

No worry though, as even without an admission of guilt, the karma police issued me out an appropriate sentence. My God, if I were to take the time to blog in detail about my relationships with women since her, you guys would almost feel pity for me. It's amazing how crazy women can be... Random digression aside, there's been more times than not over the past decade where I wanted to find her and simply say, "Hey. I'm sorry."

Sunday afternoon, I got my chance. It wasn't a long apology, mostly because it didn't need to be. But it was heartfelt. And I think she understood that as she gracefully accepted my apology. Which was awesome, because she would have been within her right to curse me out...

It's good to know that she's still a bigger person than I am.


Random TOPolk Trivia: Starting with the girl this post was about, every girl that's ever meant something to me emotionally (good or bad) has a song. The title of this blog post is hers.

Clock Out

As the time at my current occupation winds down, I can only sit back and wonder "what happened?" I knew that the job I was taking wasn't going to be the greatest, but at least it looked good on paper. Unfortunately, some four months later, I found out that looks ain't everything.

Now this isn't going to be a post pointing out what was wrong with my job and why I'm leaving. Sure, the job has its share of flaws (and what job doesn't?), but I don't really have any motivation to talk about the negatives. Hell, its not like it would matter anyways as I never bothered to mention my company by name once in this blog (or on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn for that matter). Unlike previous jobs that I've left, there's no ill-will, animosity, or conflicting interests here that would spur me to toss out one last jab before moving on with my life. The job just wasn't for me.

Moving along, what I do want to talk about are the things I do want out of whatever job I sign on for next. Much like my previous inability to find a girl who wasn't completely insane, I can't find a job that isn't completely mundane. So, in an effort to replicate some blogging magic, I'm going to tell Life, "HEY! AT A BARE MINIMUM, THIS IS WHAT I WANT." I mean, what could it hurt?...

A desk and a lunch break. OK, I'm about to make myself a liar. Only until my current job did I mistake these two things as workplace luxuries. Go fig. If the next job offered to me doesn't come with a space to call my own and a bit of time for me to get away from work, I'm not taking it. Period.

Structure. Such a small word, but it's encompassing of so many things that I want. I want to know what I'm supposed to be doing. I want to know where to find resources if I need help. I want to where I'm supposed to be working. I want to know the proper chain of command. I want to know what decisions I can and cannot make (and not by "trial by fire"). I could go on and on with this list, but long story short, I just want some level of proper organization. The one company I worked for that excelled at making sure there was a rhyme AND reason as to why things were done is not surprisingly the company I worked for the longest.

A mentor. The job I hated the most was the only job I had where someone was around to show me the ropes and share the tribal knowledge that's gained not from a memo, but from experience. That was also the job I did my best work at. That was almost six years ago. Now armed with an MBA and four years of work experience, I'd kill for a similar situation now.

Fun. I know, "work sucks." If it didn't, it wouldn't be called work. But come on life, throw me a bone here. Make me want to go to work for reasons other than "I need to keep the lights on." A funny coworker or two, a soft work environment, and internet access go a long way in making me not mind staying late or voluntarily working weekends.

Hopefully life hears my cries and remembers all this come March. Why March?

Because sometimes life needs to play itself out in order for you to make the most informed decision possible...

"There always has to be a plot twist. That means that things always go wrong once before you get to the happy ending." - Sylvia, "Viewtiful Joe" (2003)

Domestic Abuse

Goal #1 of winning the regular season: Accomplished

Now it's time to bring home the hardware.